I'm exhausted and I have velveeta stuck in my teeth
Did you eat out Derrek's girlfriend again?
i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
So it turns out my dad calls his penis "John" which means he either named me after his penis or his penis after me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my poor anus
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
He said "send me a motivational picture" so I sent one with mayo on my face that said "clearly I'm no stranger to white stuff on my face"...I'm the fuckingng worst
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
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