Trust me, I wear more condoms than socks. I wouldn't risk infecting my cock. It's my livelyhood.
Your vagain smells worse when im sober.
sorry, worng number
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
Randomize
