She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
Why did you video tape me drying my boxers in the microwave?
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got a lapdance on the metro. She said she was on maternity leave and needed the practice.
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
Nope. She just screamed at me "YOU WERE A FAILED ABORTION" and "I'LL PUT ANTHRAX IN YOUR PILLOW YOU LITTLE FUCK". Best mother award ever
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
I just woke up to three voicemails from you. In the first one you just straight laughed for 3 minutes. In the second you did bird calls. In the third you were hysterically crying. Have fun last night?
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
I'm not sure why he thinks weird that I masturbate AND look at pinterest at the same time.
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
Love that I’m sending my uber driver a thank you message for taking me home via mcdonalds tonight before I’m messaging my date from tonight! Lol
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