Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
I just bought a vibrating toothbrush with my parents FSA insurance card because I'm too broke for a vibrator. New.Level.Of.Low.
Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
I got to the apartment, I was handed a beer within 20 seconds, I'm glowing in the dark, there's fog everywhere, and now I'm wearing a sombrero because apparently it's silly hat night. I never want to leave.
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
Is it socially acceptable to be blind drunk at half five on a Monday afternoon?
Which pub are you in?
i know i saw many looks of jealousy when i walked solo into subway carrying a cheesy gordida crunch after taco bell closing hours
I'm sure for most of the people, it was the one and only miracle they will see
I've somehow found myself in an emotionally abusive relationship with a married man who gives me drugs.
My life is quickly turning into a Lifetime movie.
He was telling me how he was trying to grow up. And then 2 minutes later, he told me he was tripping on lsd for the first time.
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
I know you think you’re ready to graduate but just keep these things in mind: taxes, I get up at 5 AM every morning, I have to buy vegetables when I go grocery shopping, and I can’t wear sweat pants to work. Take that victory lap and enjoy the sweat pants and bar hopping because it goes downhill real quick.
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
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