I woke up this morning in a strange bed with a kid with an accent playing with my feet.
So I went home with some chick last night... I'm not sue what's worse: not getting a nut at 5am, the condom breaking and not being replaced, feeling poo when I put my finger in her but, sleeping on a heroin mattress in her living room, her swine flu coughing fit at 7am or realizing she peed the matt at 10am. Actually it was probably the fact that she continuously told me she was the classiest girl in boulder.
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
I woke up under a table, with a huge Mexican sombrero, a box of 120 doughnuts and a bloody nose. It all screams success.
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
It is unclear if my flaming esophagus is hangover induced.
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
Your ex roommate is making out w the kid who pees on floors and it's kinda funny
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
Nothing is more confusing than dreaming about being chased by jets, then waking up with an erection.
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