Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
He ran into the room yelling "attack! Attack!", jumped on top of me on the air mattress, popped the air mattress, and then we had victory sex, because he was proud of popping it.
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
I need a new pic for your contact id. Because your boobs popping up when I'm having dinner with my grandma or, ya know, when kids have my phone isn't so good.
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
I nicknamed her "Jackhammer" for the way she gave me a handjob. My balls were in constant pain
Randomize
