I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
You okay?
I walked into work with a banana and a loaf of bread
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
When we were done he got down next to the bed and I thought he was Tebowing. He was hitting a bong that he had already loaded and hidden under the bed.
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
Randomize