they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
apparently red wine has the total opposite effect that whiskey does on his dick
you're the only person i know to use "jizz" and "cute" in the same sentence.
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
He snapchated me a photo of his penis with the caption "it needs a home".
It's like an adderall Houdini. Right when you think you have a deal he disappears
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
Randomize
