You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
phone sex would be way better if there was an app for that...
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
I know you're on vacation but you should know I just walk of shamed through a hotel lobby while leaving a threesome on Friday the 13th. Fuck superstition, I win.
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
I didn't notice because vodka
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
I just came so hard my vision went blurry. I can only hope one day I'll find a man that can accomplish what my left hand does on a tri-daily basis.
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
No actually you're a pro. You puked on the cab ride, and managed to completely contain it in your purse. the cabbie was even impressed.
Randomize
