do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
He made a fake guest pass that was just a note card with "I'm here. Me." written in sharpie, and tried to convince the security guard it was real.
Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
we came into the house to find you doing shots by your self and when we told you to stop you locked yourself in the bathroom...
did I at least say anything...
you meowed at us and said you're a cat and cats drink for a living
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
So much rum. So many feels.
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
That's why we have robots to masturbate for us
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