Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
my one-armed grandma is doing the YMCA. you figure it out.
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
I think this agreement was sent by God. I get to do my own thing, get laid, and he still makes me breakfast in the morning.
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
just woke up with a trucker hat, half a grilled cheese, and popcorn spread everywhere. last night must have been good.
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
Randomize
