I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
I wanted sex but got Ace Ventura: Pet Detective, instead. Then I had to drive 30 minutes home wet. Worst booty call, ever.
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
Apparently swingers are magnetically drawn to me?
I just apologized to a wet floor sign i walked into.
Randomize
