Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
Why did 20 jello shots in a row sound like a good idea last night?
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
I hate when people see you passed out in your front yard and call 911. Like what, you can't take a nap face down on your steps at 4pm?
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
I gave you chlamydia, you gave me a concussion. Now we're even.
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
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