I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
dear sober me, don't br the first to open the fridge in the morning
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
I just found a bottle of gin in my vegetable crisper. Party is back on.
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
I was dancing with a blow torch in one hand and a bowl of weed in the other
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
Randomize
