she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
Petting the cat and listening to "you've got a friend". This is why I smoke weed. To make sense of situations like this.
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
He asked me how flexible I was and all I could think about was that time I threw my back out putting in a tampon.
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
Randomize
