i don't like sucking hair
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
I looked at the bar tab this morning. The bartender added a $25 'customer asshole fee'. I have no grounds to dispute it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
Day 8 of being sober: Sniffed an empty beer bottle at a restaurent and almost licked it. This is not working
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
I'm drinking and throwing an enormous tennis ball at children. I couldn't be happier.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
all i remember of last night is that i was drinking jameson and then NOTHING i do remember walking a dog though\nwhich is sooo fucking weird
OH MY GOD ITS COMING BACK I PUT THE DOG IN THE HOTTUB TOO
say penis size is all related to how funny you are and then tell a feminist joke. if she laughs, you got double points, if she slaps you, she probably wasn't going to sleep with you anyway
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
You brought string cheese to the strip club
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
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