your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
And if I hated you I'd probably say things like, "I never want to speak to you again," or, "Eat a bag of dicks." That's how you'd know.
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
I love you. We're gonna celebrate your 21st by putting people in duct tape bikinis and pushing them down tequila slip and slides
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
I didn't have toilet paper until 20 minutes ago. But I have champagne. Priorities.
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
Stay calm. It's a titty bar. A ring of cocaine will protect you.
Just don't have sex while watching Home Alone. It will ruin Christmas for you.
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
He showed up to my apt at 6am wearing a suit and holding a bag of coke....how could I not let him in?
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
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