when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
i found a beer bottle on top of the urinal, peed in it and put it back... if anyone gets drunk enough to fall for it they deserve it
There are not one, but two women wearing my boxers on the couch right now. You need to wake the fuck up.
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
I just found little boats floating in my bathtub....they are made out of white castle boxes, condoms, pickles, and corks. All the wine we bought is being used as the "ocean"....clearly we didn't drink any of the wine.....but I don't remember doing this.
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
That's what you get for drunk dialing me to ask what kind of flowers I like while outside of a strip club, after telling me you "made it rain"
You demanded I give you a glass of water, so I set it down in front of you and you knock it over and roll in it..,
I wanted to be a dolphin.
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
Just got a blow job from a woman on a ski slope. She said ski'ing frightens her and giving head calms her down. Glad I could help ma'am!
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
Dude on a beach in sicily and a blonde jesus just smoked us out and then tried to makeout with me I am never leaving this place
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
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