East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
I need a secretary to manage my drinking schedule.
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
The waitress at the airport bar just asked me if I wanted a "to go" beer, hahahahaha OF COURSE I WANT A TO GO BEER.
First thing that comes on in the morning is kanye's I can't hold my liquor. yeezus lives.
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
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