you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
I looked at her and said "I now pronounce you pumpkin tits"
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
Apparently 'check out this motherfucker' is not an appropriate greeting to use in the vicinity of sitting united states senators. Who knew
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
I wasn't even hungover I was just mourning my dignity
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
We just fucked in the park on a bench and a guy with a dog walked past us and the dog walked right up to us while the guy stared at his phone.
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
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