Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
You weren't a difficult drunk to take care of. I just had to stop you from plunging the toilet once or twice.
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
Oh I forgot to tell you that while you were in the bathroom last night I made friends with a gay man named Rodger from Venezuela and he kissed me cheek and told me I "knew how to shake my thing". From now on we go to the bathroom as a team.
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
And if I don't get arrested for drinking and canoeing over the next 3 days, this hurricane will not have turned out anywhere near as well as I planned
woke up with empty beer can still duct taped into my fists and the word "dove" written on the back of my neck
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
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