i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
I did something stupid with eggs call me when you get up. Cops were also involved.
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
it was really awkward meeting your mom for the first time while i was still wearing the condom we were using.
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
Do you not realize that being Batman fulfills about 95% of my non-sexual fantasies?
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
I see more hoeing in ur future
Randomize
