Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
260 beers this month. I need a new hobby.
I just had to download an app to edit pictures on my new phone. The things I do for sexting...
He gave me a card that said "I'm so glad we found each other... In the pants" and a pat on the head... My walk of Shame wasn't so bad.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know shes my ex. And I know she punched me in the face and stole my car to go get drunk. But it's the best sex I've ever had.
You're sick. Take pictures if you can.
How do you tell someone who's buying a pregnancy test to have a nice day .... Like how
Sorry my hands just texted you
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
It's no shave November. This is our time.
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
Our love of vodka is more proof than a maternity test
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
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