grandma shit on top of the toilet
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
Wait. Wine + Crossbow..?
He literally chugged a bottle of wine in under 2 minutes. Stood up, said "fuck what ya heard" and stabbed the bottle into their drywall.
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I fell asleep with a half eating burrito in my hand and woke up to cat vomit with burrito in it.
WHY DID YOU INVITE ALEX?!?
Because she offered to bring a keg.
And also because you fucked her in an alley last week and I'm trying to be a good friend.
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
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