I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
FYI, grandma is already drunk and using a bed sheet as a table cloth.
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
I just want to smoke this blunt and eat pizza rolls while watching The Price Is Right with you.
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
Last night this creepy guy asked me my name and I told him it was Jaundice and he called me that all night
I’m gonna stop you right there. The last time you had a “brilliant” idea, I woke up to my kitchen covered in flour and a javelin through my tv.
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
Randomize
