did we hook up?
no, because you kept repeating "itty bitty titties" when i took off my shirt
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
For the record you're an amazing lay and you have great taste in breakfast sandwiches
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
Randomize
