super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?
Good thing I took the morning after pill cuz I pretty much had packaged seamen in me like I was a squirrel saving it for later or something
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
I keep thinking your bag of thongs is a bag of chips. So mad I can't eat them.
I took a cab from the club to the grocery store. I needed peanut butter.
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
It's sad that I'm more proud of my Twitter account then my resume
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
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