Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
I just chugged whiskey at 7 AM because going to breakfasts at Brendas doesnt seem right if Im not real drunk. I feel like when Brenda takes my order she can tell Im drunk and will take care of me.
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
Randomize
