a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
Mom and Dad are dead. Trust fund
Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
My grandpa is giving me detailed instructions on how to fight a second floor bedroom fire from a ladder on the out side. Just in case
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
I warned you. Don't come crying to me when your vagina refuses to forgive you for this.
I may or may not have puked near a bear on the side of the road this morning.
How was your night?
Good. I made people cry and run home
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
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