you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
My life would be so much easier if i could just ride around in the cash cab all day
she went apple picking. why dont we do cute things like that? let's go to a pumpkin patch!
because we're not cute. we're sluts. and sluts don't go apple picking.
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pretty sure I sang "What Makes You Beautiful" to some random guy in a parking lot last night...
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
This guy kept trying to use "see? I'm clean. Cleared by the plasma place today." as a pick up line. This is not okay.
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
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