I'm not a real person
I'm sorry, everyone knows that
so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
Nice. Don't spend your therapist's co-pay on Jaeger bombs.
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
I just did something so unspeakable in the panera bathroom that their health score dropped 10 points.
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
She started calling me daddy on the second date and I don't know how to react to that
He literally shoved the EMT, climbed in the back of the ambulance with his vodka and was like, "C'mon, people. Wrap this up. I got shit to do."
You are not allowed to sing ever again, my ears are still ringing.
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
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