You know your in college when you use the receipt from the liquor store as a bookmark
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Were not alcoholics, were just impatient for fridays
I shouldn't have to say "get your balls off my counter" on a Wednesday.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the bride at the wedding we just crashed said we can stay only if we strip for her. You need to get down here
I just squirted in your honor. It's like pouring one out for the beautiful sex partnership that could have been
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
I think vodka/water/skittles totally beats your crystal light mimosas
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
Randomize