"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
Yeah I don't even know dude. This shit has reached new levels of ridiculous. Let's hope baby Jesus gallops down a rainbow on a sparkling unicorn and wills that bitch clean. I think that's the best chance we've got.
So I hooked up with a guy with a mustache and woke up on a dragon futon underneath a dragon yin-tang tapestry... My life is spiraling in a weird way.
Yes. We drank 3/4 of a handle of vodka, fried and ate a 3lb package of bacon, I tackled the neighbors snowman, made snow angels in our underwear, and then fucked all night. Christmas success.
So she just had an emotional breakdown over a birthday card with a peacock on it. Yeah. She's pretty drunk, but we made it home safely.
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
Will you remind me I changed my hotspot phone password to fuckyouprivilegedwhitedude
I just remembered that the guy I slept with last night has "USDA PRIME" tattooed on his ass
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