your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
Just left a strip club where they let me on stage to teach them tricks. Time of my life!
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
What i love about my dog is i can lay in bed and masturbate with him at the foot, and he just leaves me alone.
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
He showed up to a booty call with 2 tea bags, but no condom...
Listen, I just paid for a hotel room, so I didn't have to have sex in his car. I'm adulting successfully.
Randomize
