Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
she was carrying the quesadilla around the bar like a security blanket
You never realize how many sex toys you have until you have to strategically hide them while moving out of your dorm.
I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
I'm cooking a can of baked beans on the baseboard heater. It is too early in the semester to be this poor.
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
For 15 minutes straight, he literally did every accent there was, from Russian to Bostonian. The issue: no one could determine whether he was sober, wasted, or anywhere in between
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
I don't know what she did to me last night, but the scratches on my back indicate that I had sex with a Bengal tiger last night.
Randomize
