What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
the only good thing about breaking up with him while naked was that i got to make a forgetting sarah marshall reference
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
You're the only one to love me enough for me to admit the following: Rock-bottom sounds like sobbing to a Miley Cyrus song.
I banged a guy named Robbie last night and in the middle of sex he begged me to scream santos. I'm pretty sure I just screwed a dude with multiple personalities.
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
Randomize
