Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
This is the prime rib incident all over again
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
Sorry, they don't make maternity Power Ranger suits...
The problem with that is that my car has been stolen
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
i'm going as a slutty football player, and all night i'll drunkily whisper "id love to catch your balls." into random strangers ears.
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
All I can remember from last night was eating nutella and touching myself to Weird Science.
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
Randomize
