found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
If im paying 4grand for laser eye surgery, it better help with beer goggles cuz last night was pretty rough.
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
Someone keeps hanging up bible verse posters in the bathroom stall I masturbate in at work.
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
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