Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
At lowes after workin outside. Kid behind me says "mommy that man smells like a taco" yes she was talking about me.
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
I don't know when it is this year, but if I ever text you an illegible text that also happens to contain sharks, Shark Week started.
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
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