last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
Cognac is not meant to be taken in shots. I just wanted you to know the desperation of last night.
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
Someone asked me why we were having sex on the porch last night. All I remember is him saying he wanted the recruits to see. This has got to stop.
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
I want a MapMyFart App, where I can mark every spot where I have ripped one. Like here.
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
We had sex on the bear rug. He said "you, me and the bear. This is bear-idise"
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
Look, road flare archery was agreed on. We both accepted it was a shit idea sober, but did it drunk anyway.
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Randomize
