When I went to court, my judge's name was Honorable Ball. I couldn't stop laughing.
that probably didn't help your case.
you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
So i learned you can't hair-of-a-dog jaeger hangovers.
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
I'm drunk, we're losing, and I'm in the visitors stands. This is about to get ugly.
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
you were angry and didn't have anything else to throw so you threw a breakfast burrito...?
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
I only have sex with you to have a memory to masturbate to.
Randomize
