First thing she said after sex was.. are you baptised by chance?
You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
She didn't know my name but she knew I was Canadian so she just called me Canada. It sounded like the national anthem when we were fucking.
Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
ecstacy + fleshlight = not all that upset about being newly single anymore
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
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