yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
These old people don't even realize they're giving me weed money for shoveling snow.
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
He called his prostate his "boner button".
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
I thought if I bought the most expensive pregnancy test I would look like I had my life together
We lost. I'mma go home and drink more and do a face mask and wonder why it is that god put me on this Earth to suffer
Randomize
