Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
vagina is talking i cant
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
I am sweating out the vodka to make room for the whiskey tonight.
Yeah I had to push her down the hallway to the hotel room in a luggage carrier. The guy at the desk told me goodluck
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
Feel like I died but someone put me In a human microwave and I got back to life.
So she just had an emotional breakdown over a birthday card with a peacock on it. Yeah. She's pretty drunk, but we made it home safely.
That moment when your mom is so drunk she makes you get out of bed to lay in her bed because she thinks it feels like sleeping on a marshmallow peep....
Would it kill us to punctuate. That last text took me 5 min to read
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
I just discovered that jello shots are the best hangover cure
You said that last night when you did jello shots at 4am
Randomize
