i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
Plan B is the new Plan A
I can no longer count the number of girls I've banged on my fingers and toes. It's like being born again.
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you told him to eat candy out of your ear instead of your vagina because you had your period. never. drink. AGAIN.
Just registered some guy for opium withdrawals. WTF opium withdrawals, who does opium anymore.
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
You blacked out and walked in on my neighbor breast feeding at 3am yelling "where is my best friend". I think we should go apologize.
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like this is the moment of high where you have to write these texts down to remember to text them and feel that somehow this is important to the continuity of the world.
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
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