Yeah no shit. My mom is giving me winecoolers as we watch a show abt alcoholics
Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We are the drunkest people in Toys R' Us right now
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
You asked me to text you at 11 and remind you that he's 33. It's 11:20. He's 33.
you're too late. he has eggnog and whiskey and all seven seasons of buffy. I shan't be coming home tonight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
oh my god. picked the worst day ever to not wear underwear...
I'm just gonna stop you right there because there is, in fact, no such thing.
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
I woke up to a shattered My Little Pony garbage pail, a black eye I don't know how I got and no one will look me in the face. Fuck tequila.
My mom just asked if I wanted a mimosa when I got out of the bath.
I think everything's gonna be okay.
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
i just woke up on the desk in his dorm with him snoring in my vagina. better than last week waking up to a different guy puking on my bare ass i guess.
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