There are traffic cones in the living room. One of them is yours.
i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
who do I fuck, the girl waiting for me upstairs or her roomate making me mac and cheese right now?? This is the single hardest decision I've always wanted to have to make
Drunk at a girls little league game. Hello summer.
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
I might have been fine if i had magic teleportation powers and could have skipped the car ride between bar and home
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
He was dressed up as Jesus and had vodka in one hand while he was blessing everyone and splashing them with holy water in the bathroom.
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
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