yesterday i saw a blind man guiding himself into a NYC tour bus... and i thought i waste money
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
She started puking and I started running and I swear to god there was a wave of vomit chasing me down the stairs.
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
Weirdly I'm doing ok, but I've tested positive for chlamydia, I wanted to let you know
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
Relax
It's hard to relax when a woman is waxing your asshole.
She fucked a bartender in a closed Applebee’s and has the nerve to call me easy
Randomize
