I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
So shortly after drunk sex...she starts crying and saying..." you don't care about me, you never do anything nice for me" so I called her a cab
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
My dream date: Hotdogs/nachos from the bar & tequila. Is that too much to ask?
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
Mom wants to know if you're coming over or if it's safe for her to take her bra off...
Randomize
