Can i not drive my cunt home
Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
No other awkward car ride can beat the one you give your drug dealer home.
I sang Seal's Kiss From a Rose to my quesadilla
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
Someone should walk up to them and say, "We're sorry, you're too hot to be out here with the other humans."
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